he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
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