Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Randomize
