I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
