Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
