let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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