she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
