oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
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She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
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That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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