would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
