this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
it's like iHOP with fire
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
