Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
