It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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