tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
