i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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