Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize