its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
