I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
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