the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
