Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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