Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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