so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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