Someone shit on the floor
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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