so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
