Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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