arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
