i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
