are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
