so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
