Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
