Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize
