Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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