So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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