you guys were way drunker than both of me
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
