Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
