Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize