apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
