Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
