thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Randomize
