It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
