I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
