im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
