What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
