I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
false alarm. still invincible.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
