Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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