I hope mine doesn't look like that
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
