so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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