I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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