Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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