butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize