He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
