How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
